I broke the baby

Yesterday was Suzianne’s two month check up. Great news: she’s 10.6 pounds and 22 inches long. All her parts are in working order. Including the plumbing, as evidenced by the explosive poop diaper she treated me, the car seat and the nurse to.

Two items of note:

1. The doctor placed Suzianne on her tummy. She lifted up her head, looked both ways and then SHE ROLLED OVER. 

Me: “Wait. What just happened there? Did my baby just roll over?”

Doctor: “You have a freakishly strong child. Be sure to record this in the baby book.”

MY CHILD IS BRILLIANT, ya’ll!  Kids aren’t supposed to roll over til their like 14 or whatever, but MY baby did so at eight weeks old.

As you’d expect, I was beaming with “Holy crap I am a freaking rockstar of a mother” pride when this happened:

Doctor: “Now, about her misshapen head.”

Me: {wide eyes. blink blink.} “No, no. She was born with a perfectly round head. I once had the stitches to prove it.”

Doctor: “Okay, but NOW the left side of her face is misshapen because she only lays on and favors her right side. I’m going to send you to a specialist to makes baby helmets for this condition.”


And that’s when it hit me: I broke the baby.

See, Suzianne is a slide sleeper. Although I place her on her back to sleep, I rock her to sleep in my lap; always on her right side, because she likes it:

When she’s in the crib, she’s on her back, but she moves her head to the right. When she’s on her play mat, she looks at things on the right. Tummy time: between lifts, she rests her head on the right side.

All my rocking and cuddling of her–always on her right side–has made the left side of her face slope down. Thanks, Gravity. You jerk.

So, now we begin the “Hey! The left side of the world is fun, too!” process. We have to make her sleep with her right side wedged up so she can’t roll to it. I’m having to change the way I hold her, feed her, rock her, put her in the car seat, crib, etc. We’ve been at it one day and she’s confused, but not too upset by it:

Next week, I’ll make the appointment with the Baby Helmet guy and hope that by the time we see him, our home interventions will have already cleared up the problem.

Have you dealt with this issue? If so, throw me your suggestions in the comments.

Sorry, Dave and Granny Sue Sue. I didn’t mean to break our baby!


7 thoughts on “I broke the baby

  1. Looking forward to chatting with you later today. Mila favors her right side (regardless of what I do) and we have an appointment with her doctor on Monday.

  2. I broke our baby too and there were mentions of helmets, but the fix is pretty easy if you’re diligent with what you’re doing … guiding her to the other side. Seriously. Her head is still super soft, so hopefully it will work and you can forgo the helmet. But even if she does need one, it’s not so bad. If she does, I’m sure hers will be pretty, pink and super-stylish!! : )

  3. You might have broken the baby, but thank goodness you didn’t let the dingo eat your baby!

    She’ll be fine and I have no doubt that you guys will do all that you need to do so she doesn’t have to wear the helmet (which actually can be kinda cute if you can find her a little skateboard to go with it).

  4. Scarlet also flattened out one side of her head because we had both babies in the same bassinet and apparently she always wanted to watch Henry, and she has a weird muscle thing in her neck (diagnosed after an ultrasound, CT scan, and urgent appointment with an oncologist to rule out leukmia, lymphoma, and other scary things all in one day- worst day as a mom ever…) We started PT around 6 weeks and her head shape is already corrected- one ear is still a little in front of the other, but has gotten much better. We’ve been propping her anytime we can- usually a rolled blanket under the one side of her back and trying to put any stimulation on her right side. Sounds like the same thing you are doing. Our PT said that they really only look at banding (helmet) if it’s not corrected by 6 months, so little Suzianne has plenty of time (and softness in her head) to correct on her own. I love seeing your updates- she’s one lucky peanut to have you for a mom!

  5. I think I broke the twins too… However the military docs said nothing, except that Kelton had an extremely large head! I told him he was fine, he just had a very large brain, so far at 8yrs old now, I was right!
    I am sure it will all work out, she still looks adorable, flat side or not!

  6. Thank you, friends! I needed to hear those stories; not that I am happy you had the same issue, only to know I’m not alone or crazy! 🙂

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