Why, yes! Today IS the third day in a row I’ve left the house! It’s extremely empowering. Thursday, doctor’s office and Mexican food. Yesterday, with mom for coffee:

Today, Chipotle with Dave. AND today, I was able to zip up my fleece for the first time in 8 months! Proof:

Oh, sure, I’m still wearing maternity jeans…but who cares?! I ZIPPED UP A FLEECE.

Also, my pumping efforts are going so much better now, which takes a lot of stress off of me. Props to Beth and Pavis for encouraging me to start pumping early. (For some reason, I thought pumping was something you only did when you went back to work? It’s not. You want to have some supply at the ready so spouse/grandmother can feed the baby while you sleep, shower, camp out at the Chick Fil A, etc.)

It has taken a while for my body to get the memo, but it’s starting to play along. Maybe it’s these Milk Makers cookies I bought? Or maybe it’s the fact that Dave is making me take more naps. Either way. Check this out:

Boom! Four ounces, ya’ll. 

These days, there’s really nothing better for my psyche than a nap, a productive pumping session and getting outside for an hour or two. Oh, I know: I’m a wild woman. Even when I’m dropping off the dry cleaning. WILD.

Don’t worry. I’m not just locking Suzianne in her room while I paint the town; Granny Sue Sue has been taking her for a few hours each day. And I have managed to get out WITH Suzianne a couple of times. It’s a wonderful feeling to push her around in her stroller. I used to see people doing that with their kids, and it would make me sad because I thought I’d never push a stroller of my own. I’m very grateful.

Grateful and very much in love with this baby girl. Even when her precious face projectile vomits on me.

At the Pediatrician’s with Granny Sue Sue

Suzianne had a great one month check up with her fabulous pediatrician today. She’s now 8.11 pounds, 21 inches long (that’s the 50th percentile for both measurements). She also got kudos for her “sweet disposition” and “alertness.” The doctor’s intern’s comment was my favorite: “this is the kind of baby that tricks you into having a second child.”

Of note: the staff thought mom and I were partners, because mom “looks so young, should could not possibly be a grandmother.”

Also, Mom is holding her in this photo because we could not figure out how to unlatch our fancy carseat (Dave normally does this), so we finally gave up and carried her into the doctor’s office instead:

I’d also like to point out that after this appointment, I breastfed my child in the back of our car. This time, there were no tears, spiders, or toilets. Just me, an Audi A4 and my momma–texting in the front seat. It was lovely.

And because nothing says “great doctor’s visit!” like queso, we hightailed it to a Mexican restaurant, where little Suzie took a nap while big Susie enjoyed a margarita:

I had a Dos Equis Amber, in case you’re wondering. My friend Marie says beer helps you boost milk supply, so, you know, drinking it was a sacrifice I made for the baby.

Week 3: in the interest of keeping it real

Whoa. This week was very much like my first trimester of pregnancy: I’m so thankful for this opportunity, but dude, it’s kicking my butt.

It’s so hard to explain how even when staring into the beautiful face of your happy, content, healthy infant, you can feel so overwhelmed, inadequate and frustrated. Also, so many awesome things happened this week, like Suzianne meeting her Great Grandparents,  her Uncle Larry, and our fabulous former DC neighbors:  

But it’s the little things, like not sleeping at night and forgetting to eat lunch…and dinner, that start to add up. Soon, you can’t handle bigger things, like attending to the backlog of thank you notes (sorry, friends!), mastering the breast pump or scouting out a private place to breast feed your child when you’re out at a fancy Ruth’s Chris steak dinner.

Yes, last Friday, we went to Ruth’s Chris to celebrate my Grandparent’s 59th wedding anniversary. The smell of steak was too much for Suzianne (that’s my girl!); she was immediately STARVING. Like, OMG, my momma SO NEVER FEEDS ME, ya’ll. 

The first time I nursed her, we were standing in the women’s room for 20 minutes because I was trying to be nice and not take up the ONE stall. I got several mean/confused stares from ladies coming and going. Thanks for your support, ladies.

Of course, 30 minutes later, she smelled potatoes au gratin was STARVING again. Like, for the love of all things holy momma, WHY DON’T YOU EVER FEED ME?

Determined not to re-live my ladies bathroom debacle, I sought out a more private place. But no such place could be found–even in The World’s Largest Ruth’s Chris. So, I nursed my baby here–on the nasty carpet floor in front of what I later figured out was the Men’s bathroom (sadly, the spider that was camped out with me is not pictured):

I only realized it was the men’s room when a nice gentleman asked if he could “squeeze by.” I thought he was exiting the building through a stairwell. Then: WHOOSH.

{Headsmack} Only the best for my baby! (sigh)

The encouraging part was when the nice dude stepped over me and Suzianne to exit the men’s room: He turned to me and said, “I want you to know I fully support what you are doing. It’s the best thing for your child. I’m just sorry you are having to do it here, like this. Ruth’s Chris should really have a ladies lounge for you.”

Amen, brother. I so appreciated that man! But I sat there and cried anyway.

The good news: our girl turned three weeks old yesterday. She is a thriving, healthy, happy little lady. We are blessed. Even if my hormones reduce me to crying fits most days.

If my momma weren’t here, I may have lost my mind by this point. Good lord, I owe my momma so much. There’s no way I can ever repay her for taking such good care of me and Suzianne these past three weeks. We love you, Granny Sue Sue:

Also, a big shout out to the Internet, which enables the amazingly thoughtful women in my life to send me emails and Facebook messages of support. I appreciate your tips, tricks and humor more than you know, friends.

The good news: every woman who has ever had a baby has shared these same emotions. It’s so hard, but so awesome all at the same time. So, I’m picking myself up, Fabreezing the carpet (there may or may not have been some infant projectile vomiting last night) taking a shower and starting anew. Here’s to a cry-free week four!

The aftermath

Here’s what your living room looks like when you’ve been engaged in a Sleep Standoff from 1:30 to 5 AM with a three week old:

We won, by the way. Thanks for playin’, Suzianne.

Great Grandparents!

Yesterday, Suzianne met her Great Grandparents, Jim and Margie Childers. A couple who today is celebrating their 59th wedding anniversary, by the way:

It was an awesome thing to see my Granny So. Freakin. Excited. about meeting her great grand baby:

And so fun having all the fam here at once. With Georgia, of course:

So blessed to have such a supportive family. So thrilled they are here during these challenging first few weeks!